Ella’s Story
On 29th January 2024, I woke up and I knew I was going into hospital that day. I’d been having bad headaches for over a month. I’d gone a few times, and they thought it was migraines, but I’d had those before and knew this felt different. I’d also been vomiting and experiencing loss of balance and nausea.
We went to hospital and pushed for a scan. Initially, they were concerned it could be a brain bleed. However, following the scan, they told me it was a tumour at the back right side of my brain. I was in complete shock. I was in my final semester of college and my life had suddenly taken a complete turn.
Within just five days, I went from being in control of my life, to being admitted to hospital, having brain surgery, awaiting biopsy results and life suddenly determined by appointments.
I stayed in hospital for a week and then went to Beaumont for surgery to re-sect the tumour. I spent a further week then in Beaumont hospital to recover as I waited for the biopsy results. With the pain of the recovery along with the wait for results, it was a really difficult time, but I had the support of my family throughout, easing my headspace. I then received the results of the biopsy, it was grade 4 brain cancer. Medulloblastoma.
I had no idea what these words meant. A lot of this experience has been learning as I go. I was so shocked with the diagnosis, nothing could have prepared me for the numbness that came with it. I didn’t have a breath to think about it before being told my treatment plan and that I’d have to go to Germany for my radiation treatment, as I needed a specific treatment called proton beam therapy, which isn’t available in Ireland. There was so much information to take in.
When I left Beaumont hospital, I spent six weeks recovering at home, but this time was filled with appointments, including the surgical staple removal, along with hearing and eye tests. I had plans for an egg retrieval to be completed as the chemotherapy put my fertility at risk, but I ended up having to go to Germany a week earlier than planned, so didn’t get to complete that. At the time I didn’t think about the seriousness of potentially losing my fertility at this age and I’m only really getting the chance to think about that now after treatment.
My mum and I travelled to Germany for me to have my proton beam therapy and even though you want the best treatment possible, it was a huge thing to go to Germany. I had to leave my final semester of college, I missed my friends and family terribly and missed just being a normal 20-year-old. My dad tried to come out to Germany every week. My sisters, who were in 5th and 6th year at the time, were able to visit me once. It was great to see them, but it made saying goodbye again even harder as I missed them so much.
As such a close family, this change felt heartbreaking.
The treatment in Germany involved proton beam radiation for six weeks, Monday to Friday, staying there for seven weeks in total. The sickness that this treatment brought with it is something I will never forget. The radiation was on my whole brain and spine, and once a week I began chemotherapy to supplement the radiation treatment. I lost my hair two weeks into radiation, which was one of the most difficult things I have had to experience. I lost a big part of me that day. It made everything feel a lot more real.
After those seven weeks, I finally went home and it felt like heaven being around everything I was familiar with again. The six-week recovery before chemotherapy was so tough, the sickness was unlike anything I have ever felt. I was vomiting and sleeping most days, so it was very difficult for me to see my friends or family as much as I had wanted to after being apart for that long.
In June 2024, I started 48 consecutive weeks of chemotherapy at a hospital closer to home. I got to know my nurses really well, who were such a strong support system throughout my treatment. It was soon after I started my treatment that I began to feel the full effects of the chemotherapy medication; nausea, sickness, body pain and fatigue. At the same time, the medication I was on to prevent certain symptoms were harsh and a shock to my body.
Throughout my treatment, I suffered a lot with nerve and muscle pain. I was having lots of testing for my hearing, as one of my chemotherapy medications put it at risk. Once ringing started in my ear, I was immediately placed on an alternative medication, which then damaged my bone marrow and affected my ability to walk properly. Out of the three types of medication I had been on, this was the one I found hardest to handle.
My hearing unfortunately has been permanently damaged by the chemotherapy.
I have hearing aids in both ears and suffer from quite severe tinnitus, which it’s been recommended I join a support group for.
Chemotherapy is a monster. I completed my deferred college semester from January to April 2025, and I finished chemotherapy in May 2025 after 48 weeks of multiple hospital admittances, emergencies and breakdowns. A battle, to say the least. I still have scans every three months and I am knee-deep in recovery. I am receiving survivorship counselling and physiotherapy to aid my recovery. Unfortunately, I still suffer from body pain and fatigue, but as time goes on, I am working to get stronger.
I am still on the same medication I was on while having chemotherapy, so the fatigue is still heavy, but once I eventually come off them, things will hopefully start to feel normal again.
But nothing feels normal after cancer…
I’m still dealing with so many of the feelings that came with my diagnosis. It’s not over when the bell rings. Far from it! Recovery is a long, difficult path, but I am so lucky to have the people around me that I do to hold me up in the hard times.
When I was going through treatment, I was the youngest by about 20 years on my ward. I knew that there were other young adults diagnosed with cancer, but I hadn’t seen any of them yet. In October 2024, I went to Daisy Lodge for a Young Adult short break, and this was the first time I met anyone else my age who was diagnosed with cancer.
Daisy Lodge was like a getaway from chemotherapy, appointments, the hospital and meeting people there my age for the first time was just amazing and comforting. It helped motivate me to complete my treatment. The short break gave me a chance to connect with other people and once you were ready, to begin to talk about it all. It was such a relief once I met the other young adults there.
I now have strong bonds that I will carry with me forever.
Having cancer impacts all areas of life and the rawness of being sick can often change who you are entirely, and with that, life changes too. I am beyond lucky for the amazing circle of family and friends that I have now. I am placing a huge focus on me, new hobbies and doing things to help my body recover. It is a slow journey, but one that will be worth it.
Cancer brought a lot of problems with it. Being in my final year of college at such a transitional stage was hard, it was difficult to communicate with my college whilst in Germany and going through treatment.
Finally, I walked across the graduation stage in October 2025, and I’m now studying towards a Masters in something I have always wanted to do.
This Adolescent and Young Adult Cancer Awareness Month, find out more about how we support young people like Ella here!
